Dearest Me,
You've been feeling sentimental for a few days now, it has been consuming an undeserved amount of our time and this has been irritating us in a seemingly crescendo fashion. I say "seemingly", because this state of mind has not been a chronic ongoing nuisance, but rather an occasional thorn in our side - much like this cholinergic urticaria I assume I have - or that sporadic blues that is bound to subside. This state is not a constant, but its outlines probably will be for a while. Allow me to put your current state of mind into perspective for you.
The last post on this blog was three years ago, and a heap of events have shaped who you are since then. It is likely useless to be stating the obvious to you, but regardless, I will do so because I feel this may lighten the burden of these idle thoughts. Who you are today, and who you will be in another three years time, are presumably also very different characters. Medical school? Well, you made it. Yes, you are done. A few glitches on the road, and then that was that. The ending was far from glorious, rather the opposite. What awaited at the end was a diverging set of tunnels, bridges, and winding alleys. The challenge goes on, ever-more daring. Residency? Research? Priorities? The list has only been lengthening with time.
You have learned that holding grudges against past ill-witted adversaries serves only to agitate your well-being. Those thoughts are best left aside. As are those obsessions about the future that you so mindlessly cherish. Whatever will be will be - admittedly directly in proportion to the effort put in, and absence of "mindless drone" behavior - or autopilot if you will. The future tends to unfold, sooner than you or I can comprehend. No, time will never revert. Time machines are yet to be invented, if ever, so do make the most of what you have. Our days though, they tend to be much more forgiving. Yes, try and try again you will. Fail, you bet. Shit is bound to hit the fan. But what distinguishes you or I will always be the ability to wear failure as a badge of honor. Keep moving forward. Pretty please.
Also, feel free to take a moment to admire what you have accomplished. Indulgence in self-importance is a no no, though. Yes, I am playing the role of Captain Obvious. No, you are not the center of the universe. Take another moment to look around and be thankful. Thankful for the circumstances that have you and I where we are, for the people that held our hand along the way, and for those who parked their bulldozers along your path. A two-second outburst of profanity will suffice for that last one. Every experience is, I believe, a fruitful one, be it sweet or rotten. However unappetizing it may seem, do make the most of it.
Circumstances are not perfect, and in all probability will never be. Indeed, perhaps perfection is a major fault in the way we comprehend and assess matters - directly linked to our Type A high expectations - demanding a flawless version of ourselves that leads to an inevitable implosion. Sometimes that reality does sink in, and makes us wonder about the meaning of it all, whether there is an ultimate purpose or not. The only reality I see today is that of imperfection, and my, how beautiful the unsound nature of that truth can be. For with the perfect romanticized model of reality that you and I are tempted into worshiping, how are we to appreciate what makes this truth unique, full of color and splendid variety. For this same reason, I have come to believe that moving past acceptance and tolerance, and embracing the colorful spectrum of peoples' individual attributes, is the only way forward for us.
Well, me. I have begun questioning my sanity with this piece of blabber, so I will stop with these philosophical thoughts and end this cheesiness. I will be moving on to the practical part of my day by tackling the subjects we've set aside to study, and interacting with those people that are a part of your present day. I do hope that the actions of our present will leave you a step closer to the über-us we aspire to become in the future. I trust that you have most of your stuff in order.
Love,
You
You've been feeling sentimental for a few days now, it has been consuming an undeserved amount of our time and this has been irritating us in a seemingly crescendo fashion. I say "seemingly", because this state of mind has not been a chronic ongoing nuisance, but rather an occasional thorn in our side - much like this cholinergic urticaria I assume I have - or that sporadic blues that is bound to subside. This state is not a constant, but its outlines probably will be for a while. Allow me to put your current state of mind into perspective for you.
The last post on this blog was three years ago, and a heap of events have shaped who you are since then. It is likely useless to be stating the obvious to you, but regardless, I will do so because I feel this may lighten the burden of these idle thoughts. Who you are today, and who you will be in another three years time, are presumably also very different characters. Medical school? Well, you made it. Yes, you are done. A few glitches on the road, and then that was that. The ending was far from glorious, rather the opposite. What awaited at the end was a diverging set of tunnels, bridges, and winding alleys. The challenge goes on, ever-more daring. Residency? Research? Priorities? The list has only been lengthening with time.
You have learned that holding grudges against past ill-witted adversaries serves only to agitate your well-being. Those thoughts are best left aside. As are those obsessions about the future that you so mindlessly cherish. Whatever will be will be - admittedly directly in proportion to the effort put in, and absence of "mindless drone" behavior - or autopilot if you will. The future tends to unfold, sooner than you or I can comprehend. No, time will never revert. Time machines are yet to be invented, if ever, so do make the most of what you have. Our days though, they tend to be much more forgiving. Yes, try and try again you will. Fail, you bet. Shit is bound to hit the fan. But what distinguishes you or I will always be the ability to wear failure as a badge of honor. Keep moving forward. Pretty please.
Also, feel free to take a moment to admire what you have accomplished. Indulgence in self-importance is a no no, though. Yes, I am playing the role of Captain Obvious. No, you are not the center of the universe. Take another moment to look around and be thankful. Thankful for the circumstances that have you and I where we are, for the people that held our hand along the way, and for those who parked their bulldozers along your path. A two-second outburst of profanity will suffice for that last one. Every experience is, I believe, a fruitful one, be it sweet or rotten. However unappetizing it may seem, do make the most of it.
Circumstances are not perfect, and in all probability will never be. Indeed, perhaps perfection is a major fault in the way we comprehend and assess matters - directly linked to our Type A high expectations - demanding a flawless version of ourselves that leads to an inevitable implosion. Sometimes that reality does sink in, and makes us wonder about the meaning of it all, whether there is an ultimate purpose or not. The only reality I see today is that of imperfection, and my, how beautiful the unsound nature of that truth can be. For with the perfect romanticized model of reality that you and I are tempted into worshiping, how are we to appreciate what makes this truth unique, full of color and splendid variety. For this same reason, I have come to believe that moving past acceptance and tolerance, and embracing the colorful spectrum of peoples' individual attributes, is the only way forward for us.
Well, me. I have begun questioning my sanity with this piece of blabber, so I will stop with these philosophical thoughts and end this cheesiness. I will be moving on to the practical part of my day by tackling the subjects we've set aside to study, and interacting with those people that are a part of your present day. I do hope that the actions of our present will leave you a step closer to the über-us we aspire to become in the future. I trust that you have most of your stuff in order.
Love,
You
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